Micro weddings are all the rage and are growing in popularity among Latter-day Saints. These small wedding ceremonies have evolved since the pandemic. People realized that fewer people, less money, and less stress might be the perfect combination for your wedding day.
So today we’ll go over all the pros and cons of having a micro wedding as a Latter-day Saint and how to decide if you should have one.
What Is a Micro Wedding?
A micro wedding is an extra small marriage ceremony with typically fewer than 50 guests.
Micro weddings are typically more intimate and private. They include the couple, close family and friends, smaller venues, and minimal decor.
However, this can all vary depending on the wedding and the couple. They still resemble a more traditional wedding on a smaller scale.
A Latter-day Saint micro wedding would likely include a few guests invited to the temple sealing and a small reception or dinner afterward.
They would likely skip large bridal parties, a large guest list, DJs, and other expensive things needed to host a large wedding.
The Pros of a Latter-day Saint Micro Wedding
Consider some benefits of having a micro wedding as a Latter-day Saint. I ended up doing a civil marriage, a temple sealing, and a large reception with a ring ceremony and it was too much. I wish I had considered some of these pros of having a smaller wedding.
Beautiful on a Budget
Micro weddings cost less. You wouldn’t need such a large budget to have a beautiful and special wedding celebration. Being more budget-friendly doesn’t mean you must skimp on beauty and elegance.
In fact, you could have a much more beautiful wedding on a smaller scale. You can get nicer or more unique venues. And you can spend more on flowers or decor since you don’t have to feed hundreds of guests.
Intimate and Drama-Free
Additionally, you can include the people most important to you. Skip the drama and stress of lots of guests, opinions, and bridal parties.
You can talk to and spend time with everyone there. At my large wedding, I hardly got to talk to anyone at all.
Flexibility
You also have more flexibility with dates, venues, decor, and wedding planning in general. You don’t have to plan around so many work schedules and booked photographers.
This flexibility allows you to get married in the middle of the week instead of the weekend. This would likely offer you better prices on venues, food, and photography.
You can also choose to DIY more things since you would need fewer pieces. Or you can use the extra money to not have to do it yourself and save you time and stress. You can decide.
Simpler Timeline
My favorite pro of having a Latter-day Saint micro wedding is that it is much easier and less stressful to have your temple sealing and other wedding events on the same day.
I had to wake up at 5 a.m. on my wedding day to get ready and get to the temple for our sealing then get to the reception. It was too much and too stressful.
But with smaller weddings, you could more easily do everything on the same day and enjoy it more.
Still Honor Traditions
Finally, you can still honor wedding traditions at a micro wedding. Apart from your temple sealing, you can have a small ring ceremony or exchange vows at your venue.
You can still walk down the aisle, do a bouquet toss, cut a cake, and dance. And for those who are shy and don’t like to be the center of attention, you can do your first dances and vows in front of a smaller crowd.
The Cons of a Latter-day Saint Micro Wedding
With any decision, you should weigh the cons. A few of these downsides might make or break it.
Family Taking Offense
A few cons of having a Latter-day Saint micro wedding would include having people feel offended for not being invited. This might also cause a problem if your family will help pay for it and wants you to have a bigger wedding. Some may not want to stir the pot for a happy occasion.
No-Shows
Additionally, if some people you invite to your micro wedding don’t show up or can’t attend, you’ll notice the difference.
It may feel more disappointing to have 20 of the 50 people you invited actually come. This can change the vibe and mood of your big day.
Missing Family Photos
Also, you may feel disappointed at not having a large family photo on your wedding day. If you don’t invite all the extended family, you won’t have everyone together for the photos.
This might be a good thing for some people. For others, they may miss this opportunity to get a nice photo with their grandparents or other friends and family.
Fear of Missing Out
Some people may also feel sad that they didn’t get to do a large wedding that they always dreamed of.
I know many who got married during the pandemic didn’t get the party and wedding celebration they always wanted.
This can be a difficult part to come to terms with when you decide to do a micro wedding. It would require adjusting expectations.
Additionally, some people may feel disappointed about receiving fewer gifts. (To me, this wouldn’t make that much of a difference as most guests don’t bring a gift to a large wedding anyway).
Going Against Tradition and Values
Furthermore, family is an important part of the gospel of Jesus Christ. As members of the Church, we celebrate and honor families.
That’s why you want to get married, after all, to start your own eternal family. So not having a large wedding where you invite everyone may feel like you are going against your values and tradition.
However, others may view Latter-day Saint micro weddings in the opposite way since the only ones invited are close family and friends who can be with them during the temple ceremony and after.
What Is the Difference Between an Elopement and a Micro Wedding?
A micro wedding looks like a traditional wedding on a much smaller scale. It often includes family, friends, and support.
An elopement in the past meant running off to get married without parental consent. Now it simply means getting married without much fanfare.
Some couples may choose to involve a few people such as parents or close friends. It typically includes going to a courthouse or wedding chapel to get married and then going out to party afterward, instead of hosting it yourself.
Both are small and budget-friendly ways to get married.
Eloping is more difficult to do as members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints if you want to marry in the temple. It’s not as easy as going off and getting married. You have to meet with your bishop and stake president, live worthy of a temple recommend, and schedule your sealing with the temple. And don’t forget to apply for a marriage license at the courthouse.
But a pro about this is the guest lists for temple sealings are already restricted to endowed, worthy members of the Church. So you can still do a small elopement or micro wedding without involving many people.
How to Know If I Should Have a Micro Wedding?
Here are a few questions you and your fiance can discuss when deciding whether you should have a micro wedding, a large traditional wedding, or an elopement.
- What do I want my wedding day to look like?
- How do I want to remember my wedding day in the future?
- Who do I want to share this day with?
- What is our budget for each option? Is anyone helping to pay?
- Do other’s opinions matter to me?
- Do I care more about saving the money or having the wedding that I want?
- What could we do with the money we save by having a micro wedding?
- Would we regret not having a large wedding?
- Would deciding to do a small wedding cause drama among friends and family?
- Would planning a large wedding be too stressful?
- Where do we want to get married?
- Who do we want to attend the temple sealing with us?
- Would our family support either decision we make?
- If we are not on the same page, how can we compromise?
Discuss or write out your answers. And you may not know the answer right away. Take some time to consider each one thoroughly. Additionally, some of your responses might change over time.
Micro Weddings: Why the Newest Trend Might Just Last
Weddings are getting more expensive every year. And I have seen a trend in Utah where people undervalue weddings. Perhaps because of how many there are, because they are never fun or well planned, or for other reasons. Either way, people don’t have as much respect for weddings as they used to.
Most weddings I have attended have simple snacks, no organization of events, and hardly any dancing. The couple spends their whole time in a reception line while guests sit, eat, talk, and get bored. Those who do dance are usually the bridal party and kids.
If they serve food, most people come and leave after they eat. They don’t stay to celebrate, dance, or participate in any other events of the day.
So people spend thousands of dollars on a wedding to have a quarter of the people they invited attend and feed guests who just want a free meal.
Those who do attend don’t stay long or give gifts. So why spend money on a disappointing day? That’s where micro weddings may be just the thing for you.
These small, intimate ceremonies cost less, are more beautiful and personal, cause less stress, and allow you to celebrate how you want with who you want.
If you have been to a lackluster, boring, wedding and also wanted to leave, you may consider a micro wedding for yourself.
What do you think about the micro-wedding trend? Would you consider having a micro wedding?
Love, Laurel
